Showing posts with label deep thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label deep thoughts. Show all posts

Friday, July 11, 2025

Why are we reading for?

Beware for another random thoughts.

As I was packing my stuffs to go back home to Jakarta for a shortwhile during summer, I packed several of my finished books to put in Dubai. Did so so that when I need to move back later on, at least I've got rid of several unused stuffs.

And then I started to think.. all these books I've read, but none of them really stuck to me. I cannot remember a memorable lines, I mean I can tell you how it made me feel reading the books, but I can barely retell you the story or the content. I read The Cultural Map. But what I can tell you about it?? Other than people came from different background and stories and how I became more 'aware' on how we say direct and indirect things, I think..

Tuesday, February 21, 2023

yes i do the cooking yes i do the cleaning

I just spent nearly 2 hours picking basil leaves, washing them, processing them, cooking pasta, washing all the utensils, eating the pasta, and then putting back all the utensils. I did that much effort just to eat a home-made pasta, guys!

harvesting my home-grown basil
harvesting my home-grown basil

blendering the basil in mixture of: olive oil, garlic, salt, pine nuts, and parmesan cheese
pesto fusilli with mushroom is done!

While preparing this after closing off work at 7.30 pm, I realized that I liked cooking so much. (Well no actually this realization has come way before this, and I already wanted to blog about my cooking but I just haven't got the time yet!)

Me and cooking
I knew that I always liked cooking. This post here is one of the example, back in 2012 I would spend my free time during school holidays to cook! The stories always ended with bad ending, though. Take that fried rice as my very first ever dish, I've made that too salty, too oily, too dry. I also tried making garlic bread, it ended up too soggy because I used too many melted butter. Also tried making fried eggs too back then and it was a trial and error too, I've always had problem with nailing the oil ratio as I was quite anti-oil haha.

If I ask myself, what do I like about cooking? Why do I cook? Maybe the answer lies in my innate pickiness towards food, but contradictively, I also like to eat a lot. I love to eat good food! I think it is a gift for me to be able to find happiness in eating good food. I'm not a big spender, but I do spend A LOT on food.

My very first experience with cooking during high school was because 1) I had too much spare time and I wanted to do something productive and 2) there was nothing to eat (that I liked) so I wanted to make the dishes myself. I asked my grandmom then to teach me how to fry eggs and make fried rice. It was tricky at first, with me being afraid with oil splashes etc but I kept on getting better!

Then came college days where I was super busy with school. The 4 years I spent at UI were undoubtedly my most productive years ever in life. There was no days without me having to do school work or internship or extracurricular work.

Then the pandemic hits.

With the pandemic, suddenly I had too much time on my plate. It was very healing for me too, because the weeks towards the pandemic, I was actually quite stressed with always having something to do on weekends. It honestly felt like my time was stolen away from me. I wanted to just laze around on weekend, but somehow the norms I had during college days had made me think that my weekend time can and should be spent on other people. The lockdown was a blessing in disguise for me because after finally realizing that my weekend time is mine and mine only to govern, I also found out that I now (then) had so much free time for ME!

All people back then did something new and tried to learn exciting things everyday. I remember that time tiktok is rising and people were making cooking videos on tiktok. I wanted to jump in the wagon! I know I like eating, I've established myself in office as a pasta lover back then, so I wanted to learn how to cook pasta on my own.

Now the reason why I didn't continue cooking after high school, aside from not having enough time, is actually about me not having the proper ingredients lol. I found that the available ingredients at my home couldn't quite cater to my aspirational menu: pasta and western food in general. During the pandemic, I've worked for a few months already and got some savings in my account. Therefore, I went straight to happyfresh (like most people did that time) and ordered my first ever groceries!

My groceries spending on happyfresh was quite hefty lol. I realized after doing the groceries, that there was reason my you should buy from traditional markets if you want to save as the price difference is quite significant. Also my very first cooking experience was basically a trial and error and I tried to follow everything the chef on youtube told me they used.

My very first experience ever (post high school)
I remember trying to replicate Willgoz's carbonara pasta back then. It was a weird fusion menu I'd say (from my 2023 quite expert perspective HAHA) as he boiled the pasta using milk while adding beef stock too. It's quite accurate in telling us to use eggs though for the sauce. I followed the recipe even to the minutes. I learned lesson 1 in cooking the hard way: always taste your cooking first.

Willgoz is using brand A pasta and he said to cook it for 7 minutes for al dente. However, I used an imported pasta so 7 minutes was too quick and my pasta was way half-cooked :) In an effort to salvage the pasta, my grandma made me reboil the pasta.. right after I've already mixed the pasta with my carbonara egg sauce... So my pasta was then al dente, but it was bland to the core as all the sauce was washed out! :(

Second try
This is quite phenomenal too. I tried making aglio olio this time. Alas, I also got it wrong this time with the pasta cooking time... I used fresh pasta and I didn't know that fresh pasta cooks way faster than the usual pasta, dammit. It should have been cooked at TWO MINUTES :))))) Since obviously the previous experience had made me worry over not cooking the pasta enough, this time I cooked it for way too long. My fettucine was super mushy and it felt like eating mushy noodles with too much black pepper T_T

After that
With my very disastrous experience in cooking pasta, I kinda gave up with creating the sauce on my own. Cooking was super tiring back then for me. I remember realizing that I clenched my jaw way too much when I was stressed, and I found that because of this cooking experience! For the few first times, after cooking I literally had trouble eating because I couldn't open my mouth properly as my jaws would get stuck. I noticed too that I would get super tired after cooking that I had to take quick naps, which would turn to hours of napping.

So I decided not to cook the sauce again on my own and turned into ready-made sauce. I like this store called Little Maria on Tokopedia and they sells various pasta cooking ingredients including the sauces. At first I bought the mushroom sauce from them, but then realizing that mushroom tend to expire quickly on sauces, I only bought their pesto sauce. To date, I still love their pesto sauce so much! However, it started to be so expensive when you think about how I needed to buy 60k a bottle sauce for 2-3 portions of pasta, when my very first reason to cooking (other than because I love doing it and I love eating) is that I wanted to save money hahaha.

So after that, I discovered three things on my cooking journey:
  1. Pasta can be simple. I no longer need to buy fancy ingredients, aglio olio is very doable with just garlic, aglio olio, chilli flakes, and mushroom. Well, packaged parsley can also be added to add greenish look. These days I also like to inject more protein to my dishes by adding chicken breasts, more mushroom, or even scallops. I like prawns too but they are too frightening to process with the skin lol.
  2. After learning how to make the OG pasta like aglio olio and carbonara, I became a huge fanatics of Italian original pasta. That's what you became when you watched too many "how to cook pasta as an italian" videos LOL. But I can't deny, those videos of Italian chefs sharing their grandma pasta taught me how to cook pasta way more effectively than any Willgoz/chef Arnold videos can. Back to the first sentence, so me being a purist meant I detest adding cheese to my pasta 🤣 It was fine when it's carbonara, but I super can't adding it when I'm eating aglio olio because it's just garlic + oil, just that. Now I don't give a fuck anymore and just add cheese however the fuck I want!
  3. Home-grown everything! To be twice as rich (by not spending!)! Remember the price of pesto sauce per bottle I mentioned? To save on delivery fee, I usually bought up to 6 bottles per purchase. In bulk, the spending amount was quite heart-shattering. I could spend 400k just to buy pesto sauce! 🫠 I did savor the usage and they can last me a few months, but it would make me dependent on them forever. So given my now added expertise in cooking, I decided to grow the ingredients for pesto on my own! At first I tried growing basil plants from seed but it didn't work well and the basil that grows is just not the type that I wanted. Luckily, youtube introduces me to basil propagation. I knew then that basil can be easily replicated from its stems! Therefore, I tried to look for genovese basil (the type that Italians actually use!) on Tokopedia. I luckily got a very good one and currently in my home, there are probably 3 other pots of mature genovese basil + 6 new small plants! :D Yep, the one you saw first on this post are the basil leaves that I grew on my own. Mind you, the result is very very good!

Other than pasta
I obviously try to cook other things aside from pasta. But to me, pasta is just the simplest and quickest delectable dish that I can make! And yes, from only cooking pasta during the weekends, now I sometimes cook pasta during dinner for the healing part and the eating good part, and I even dare to cook it during my short 1-hour lunch break.

Other than pasta, I also learned how to cook steak. I tried cooking several high grade steaks, I always buy MB6 above btw. But the result was just always so so to me. I thought it would be very economical as usually the one we bought on resto on 400k IDR was probably just an MB2 wagyu, but in reality making a high grade pasta tasty is so difficult. I am yet to nail the secret, is it my stove? Is it my pan? Steak is tricky because every video tells you different tricks. I fell to the same rabbit hole as with my very first experience with cooking pasta: believing blindly at what the youtuber told you. I was told to cook like 30 seconds per side for medium result etc etc etc but in reality you have to really know visually what does a good steak looks like etc etc.

So I haven't nailed steak and would like to just buy steak in a high-end restaurant lol, just wanna see if it's my taste buds that just can't accept steak or if it's my cooking skills. Hoping for the latter because I want to know what's good with steaks!

Me cooking thin sliced beefs + saikoro meltique is a different story by the way. They tasted good! I think the sauce is: oyster sauce, kikkoman, garlic, saori teriyaki, and honey. It tasted superb!

Also tried chicken katsu + japanese curry rice. Tasted superb but I'm yet to nail the water level consistency to make it into the right thickness.

I once made fried rice with dashi powder topped with runny omelette added with cheese. It was one of the most delicious fried rice I've ever cooked and eaten in my entire life... but again I've yet to make another perfect one! Fried rice is quite tricky because I need to prepare the refrigerated leftover rice from even the night before.

Yes i do the cooking yes i do the cleaning
I made this post late at night because I wanted to actually publish something on this blog after a long time not being able to. My friend posted a blog of his the other day and wow I was baffled at how he really managed to write that long ass blog post despite being busy with travelling etc (he ran a travelling blog and had just came home). Maybe he wrote that during the time he spent on airport/plane? Either way, I should also just write and let the mood lead me instead of postponing and daydreaming all day hahaha.

I realized I love cooking so much and despite the challenges it brought me in the beginning (the wasted ingredients, the TMD with my jaw, the failed dishes etc), it brings me so much joy. It became the thing I'm willing to do after a busy day at work just because I like it. And I would even do the cooking even when my sister (aka helper lol) is away and I got no one to do the cleaning for me.

To think that until a year ago, I still needed to watch a youtube video before cooking (bcs I'm afraid I'd mess up the recipe! lol) and now I'm the pan-flipping cook who can create (MAINLY PASTA) dishes however I want them to be, I'm immensely proud of myself. HEHE.

(Will add pics when I have the time! I always have pics because I've made it a personal commitment to always document the food I eat and we're talking about the food I cook myself here! haha)

Saturday, October 3, 2020

Finding good inspiring talks is like fate! Another side of my naïve life, ride-hailing loyalty, to life lessons.

So, hello!

This would be my first ever blog post written on a whole new Blogger interface. I have been getting the prompts about the update being rolled out soon and it kept on asking me whether I want to try first or not. And I kept on ignoring it too! I've been on this platform for too long and I think they did make changes several times but nothing has been significant enough to confuse me. I gotta say, this newest change that they make is by far the most significant. The interface is much simpler and probably cleaner (thus it should be more aesthetically pleasing?); however, I think the thing with the back-end is that sometimes functionality rules over aesthetic.. And with the new massive simplicity that is being offered at the table, I just miss the old-school complexity where I just knew which to click when I need something. Basically what they removed (and I can't seem to find how to reverse/show this feature) is the HTML part.. now it's weird for me to embed videos from YouTube on posts because the code won't work and I need to copy-paste the video frame, which works too but it's more unreliable on the UX.. okay enough with the ramble.

Basically I'm sharing you guys another video from YouTube! Only this time, it's not a K-pop song recommendation, though I would definitely still have a lot on my hand to give you hehe.

Tonight, on a random event of YouTube-ing (and I gotta say, fate!) I stumbled upon this inspirational video:

I say fate too because I wouldn't have gotten the recommendation to this video and would never click on it if I didn't read my friends' tweet on the other day. On that tweet, he was complimenting on Pak Gita's presentation skill. I was intrigued and did a quick look on his videos on YouTube. At some point, it got me to a video of Sacha (a Youtube) who did review on Pak Gita's English. I think people's good English pronunciation has always been my weak points.. hahah so I did watch the video and wow he is one of the most fluent Indonesian I have ever seen!

On that video, Pak Gita was moderating a talk with Nadeim Makarim. Nadiem is also a cool person that I kinda look up to. He is intelligent, he is eloquent with words, and he is (from what I perceive) quite sincere too. In this (what I planned out as a short reflectional writing), I will try to lay out several key take-aways that might be useful for me to read again and for you to know :)

Monday, June 1, 2020

#Random 15: Preferences

When we were little, filling out personal information or biodata on our friends' binder was such a trend. I remember this suddenly because yesterday one of my friends posted her binder on Instagram and wow it did bring back memories!

This is yet another random thought from me.

I was just scrolling Instagram and I realized that during this WFH, I did buy or do a lot of things that I like. I like pasta a lot, so I buy so many pasta ingredients and explore so many recipes to make pasta on my own. I like noodles so much so I was almost always spontaneously buy noodles when my friends sell them (during WFH, so many people become sellers haha). I like dimsums and just now I bought dimsums from my friends!

Today, my idol has just released new songs. I can tell that I like their b-tracks but I haven't really
become obsessed with the title track. I can also tell that even though their MV is superb, I still prefer other groups' MV concept.

Linking this back to my introduction, growing up I wasn't someone who has strong preferences of something. When I filled the MaFav or MiFav part, I just add food that I tried before or sounded cool, I didn't really have something favorite that time, though.

I realized that now, I can finally have preferences over something. I am still a very agreeable person to the point that I think that this is my weakness. I don't know, is it my pacifist self over compromising things? Or just like favorite foods or favorite drinks or favorite MV, probably I should just try to explore more things so I can have better opinions on things, thus being less agreeable and more critical on things?

And like other #random tagged posts should be, this is where I will end this random self-reflection.

(Wow, WFH really gives me time to reflect on things and actually write them here!)

BONUS (added per June 4)
You know I love to re-read my own writing and suddenly I found this page on my blog where I talked about myself. You can see the cringe page here and if you are wondering why it has '(2)' that's.. because I have the original About Me version that is much much moreeeeeeeeee cringey. :)

SO I dare myself to ready that cringey post and oh what the hell how.. could.. I.. even.. think.. of writing that!?!?!?! It's soo sooo bad and self-conceited omg I don't know 10th grader me was THAT pathetic. Ew.

Why I decided to add a bonus part here after rereading that page is because I found this part:
excerpt from my About Me (1) that was so so so so cringey
EXACTLY! I wrote myself a biodata! And you can see there just how basic and mainstream my favorite things were... duh I clearly hadn't been exploring the world. Also 'profesi yang ditetapkan Tuhan Yesus' what the hell man hahahahaha it's like I gave up in actually deciding things on myself and wanted to just accept anything my parents wanted but justifying that it was all God's fate lol. Though not gonna lie that following what my parents wanted worked quite okay for me now, but just I really did not look up into any other choices at that time! Hahahaha.